Colourful Curses

If you're thinking why the hell has this guy spelled "color" as "colour", well you can fu*k off!

But you see, that's my problem. I have a very limited and dull vocabulary when it comes to abuses. Have tried incorporating the "good words" in my lexicon, but all that comes out of my mouth is the sadakchaap stuff any person gets familiar with after having stayed in New Delhi for over 7 minutes.

So as a last resort, I have decided to assemble together some of the most creative gaalis I've come across. Hopefully writing this blog will remind me of doing this very important task of my life. So, here's the list in my majestic mother-tongue, Hindi (have added their English translation in case you don't know Hindi):

1. Choot ke bhoot (Ghost of a cunt)
2. Bhoot ki choot (Cunt of a ghost)
3. Lawda pakoda (Dick sausage)
4. Choot ke paseene (Sweat of cunt)
5. Choot ke maindak (Frog of a cunt)
6. Lund khajoor (Stupid Dick)
7. Sust lund ki paidaish (Son of a lazy dick)
8. Teri chut mein chugli (Itch in the cunt)

(FYI, it sounds waaay more awesome in Hindi!)

And now for some English in case you were thinking I lacked sophistication:

1. Inhuman cunt worm
2. Gaylord ponker
3. Senile douchewaffle bender
4. Indeterminable cock stain
5. Pus licking hole plugger
6. Dried out arse excrement

Hope this endeavour helps my vocabulary. And if you're still thinking why has this guy spelled "endeavour" and not "endeavor", well you can take your dick and stick it in a maggot infested llama cunt you animal fondling nutsack!

(Here are some very useful links in case you wanna explore this fascinating field further:

http://www.youswear.com/index.asp?language=Hindi

http://foulomatic.hnldesign.nl/

http://www.buzzfeed.com/robinedds/ways-to-swear-like-a-pro#.oanla0435)